Quiz: What Are My Pronouns?

Picture this: you meet an old friend after years apart. They look different, sound different, and when someone refers to them as “she,” you freeze. Language, which seemed so simple and straightforward, suddenly becomes a minefield of awkwardness. Sound familiar? Welcome to a world where pronouns aren’t just a grammatical category, but a key to understanding human identity.

What Are Personal Pronouns and Why Do They Matter?

Pronouns are linguistic chameleons. In school, we learned they’re words that replace nouns: he, she, they. Simple grammar, right? But behind this simplicity lies an entire universe of human experience.

From a neurolinguistic perspective, pronouns activate entire networks of associations in our brain. When we hear “she,” our brain instantly constructs an image: femininity, certain social roles, expectations. This happens in milliseconds, unconsciously. Research shows that misusing someone’s pronouns activates the same brain regions responsible for processing physical pain – that’s why it matters so much.

Different languages handle pronouns differently. Turkish has a universal “o” for all genders. Finnish uses “hän.” Swedish introduced the gender-neutral “hen” in 2015, joining “hon” (she) and “han” (he). Meanwhile, English speakers have been creatively using singular “they” for centuries.

Fun fact: Shakespeare himself used singular “they.” “There’s not a man I meet but doth salute me / As if I were their well-acquainted friend,” he wrote in “A Comedy of Errors.” So debates about the “grammatical incorrectness” of they/them pronouns are more about conservatism than linguistics.

What Is This Quiz About?

Our quiz isn’t a grammar test. It’s a self-discovery tool built at the intersection of psychology, sociology, and linguistics. We’re not trying to box you in or slap labels on you. Instead, we’re helping you find language to express what you might already feel.

The quiz methodology is based on contemporary research in gender identity. We don’t analyze what clothes you wear or what music you listen to – those are stereotypes. Instead, we focus on your internal sense of self, how you perceive your identity in a social context.

The quiz works like a mirror. It reflects what’s already within you, helping you see it more clearly. It’s like tuning a musical instrument – we help you find the note that resonates specifically with you.

Signs We Relied On When Creating the Quiz

In creating this quiz, we relied on three key dimensions of identity:

1. Internal Self-Perception
   This is the deep feeling of who you are. It doesn’t depend on external factors – clothing, behavior, interests. It’s that elusive “self” that remains constant even when everything around changes. Some describe it as a “gendered soul” – a controversial metaphor, but an understandable one.
2. Social Presentation
   How do you want others to perceive you? This isn’t about masks or pretense. It’s about authentic self-expression in social spaces. Some feel comfortable in traditional gender roles, others outside them, and still others in constant movement between them.
3. Linguistic Comfort
   Which words make you feel “yes, that’s me”? Language isn’t just a collection of sounds. It’s a tool for creating reality. When someone uses the right pronouns, it creates a sense of visibility, recognition, existence.

We also considered cultural context. What works in one culture might not work in another. For instance, some Indigenous cultures recognize “two-spirit” people – those who embody both masculine and feminine spirits. In Indian culture, there are hijras – a recognized third gender. Our quiz strives to be sensitive to this diversity.

Pronoun Options You Might Get as a Result

• He/Him
  Traditionally masculine pronouns. But “traditional” doesn’t mean “limited.” Many people choosing these pronouns are redefining what it means to be a man in the modern world. It can be about strength and protection, but also about vulnerability and care.
• She/Her
  Traditionally feminine pronouns. Choosing these pronouns isn’t necessarily about pink dresses and makeup. It’s about identifying with the female experience in all its diversity – from warriors to scientists, from mothers to rebels.
• They/Them
  Gender-neutral pronouns. This is the choice of those who feel outside the binary system or are in the process of searching. It’s been used as a singular pronoun in English since the 14th century, making it both historically grounded and contemporarily relevant.
• Ze/Zir
  One of several neopronouns created to fill linguistic gaps. Ze (pronounced “zee”) replaces he/she, while zir (pronounced “zeer”) replaces his/her. These pronouns offer precision for those who find traditional options insufficient. “Ze loves zir coffee black” flows just as naturally as any other pronoun once you’re familiar with it.
• Xe/Xem
  Another set of neopronouns (pronounced “zee” and “zem”). Some prefer these for their complete departure from traditional pronoun sounds. They represent linguistic innovation meeting personal authenticity. “Xe told me xem favorite book” – new sounds for new identities.
• Fae/Faer
  Inspired by fairy/fey imagery, these pronouns (pronounced like “fay” and “fair”) resonate with those who feel a connection to otherworldly or nature-based identity concepts. “Fae shared faer thoughts on the matter” – for some, these pronouns capture something ethereal that other options miss.
• Fluid or Changing
  Some people use different pronouns in different contexts or life periods. This isn’t about indecisiveness – it’s about identity flexibility. Like a river that remains a river even while changing course.
• Any Pronouns
  “Call me whatever feels right” is also a valid position. Some people don’t attach great importance to pronouns, focusing on other aspects of identity.

The Importance of Self-Identification

Philosopher Judith Butler said gender is performative. But it’s not a theatrical performance – it’s performative in the sense of creating reality through repeated actions. Every time we use pronouns, we participate in creating someone’s reality.

Self-identification is an act of radical honesty with yourself. In a world constantly trying to tell us who we are, declaring “no, I know myself better” is revolutionary. Small, personal, but revolutionary.

Neuroscience shows that when our external presentation aligns with our internal sense, cortisol (stress hormone) levels decrease and serotonin levels increase. Simply put – being yourself is good for your health.

But self-identification isn’t just about personal wellbeing. It’s about creating a world where diversity is the norm, not the exception. Where every person has the right to language that reflects their true essence.

Ultimately, pronouns are small words with big meaning. They can become bridges to understanding or walls of misunderstanding. The choice is ours. And this quiz is simply a tool to help make that choice more conscious.

Remember: there are no right or wrong answers. There’s only your truth. And it deserves respect.